Marriage Be Hard: 12 Conversations to Keep You Laughing, Loving, and Learning with Your Partner

Name: Marriage Be Hard: 12 Conversations to Keep You Laughing, Loving, and Learning with Your Partner
Rating: 4.9 (86 reviews)

by: Kevin Fredericks (0)

Discover the keys to upholding your vows while staying sane in this hilariously candid guide to relationships, from the husband-and-wife team of comedian Kevin Fredericks and influencer Melissa Fredericks

“Kev and Melissa are not afraid to tell the truth!”—Tabitha Brown, New York Times bestselling author of Feeding the Soul

Growing up, Kevin and Melissa Fredericks were taught endless rules around dating, sex, and marriage, but not a lot about what actually makes a relationship work. When they first got married, they felt alone—like every other couple had perfect chemistry while the two of them struggled. There were conversations that they didn’t know they needed to have, fears that affected how they related to each other, and seasons of change that put their marriage to the test.

Part of their story reads like a Christian fairytale: high school sweethearts, married in college, never sowed any wild oats, with two sons and a thriving marriage. But there’s another side of their story: the night Melissa kicked Kevin out of her car after years of communication problems, the time early in their marriage when Kevin bordered on an emotional affair, the way they’ve used social media and podcasts to conduct a no-holds-barred conversation about forbidden topics like jealousy, divorce, and how to be Christian and sex positive. (Because, as Kevin writes, “Your hormones don’t care about your religious beliefs. Your hormones want you to subscribe to OnlyFans.”)

In Marriage Be Hard, the authors provide a hilarious and fresh master class on what it takes to build and maintain a lasting relationship. Drawing on interviews with experts and nearly two decades of marriage, they argue that

• Compatibility is overrated.
• Communication is about way more than simply talking.
• Seeing divorce as an option can actually help your marriage.
• There’s such a thing as healthy jealousy.

Real marriage is not automatic. It ain’t no Tesla on the open road. Sometimes it’s a stick shift on a hill in the rain with no windshield wipers. But if you get comfortable visiting—and revisiting—the topics that matter, it can transform your bond with your partner and the life you’re building together.

Written for those tired of unrealistic relationship books—and for anyone wondering if they’re the only ones breaking all the rules—Marriage Be Hard is a breath of fresh air and the manual you wish existed after you said “I do.”

The Reviews

I am not married yet, but the nuggets in this book has given me a new perspective on marriage. I know that marriage will be hard work but this book shows practical ways to work through some problems. I love how the authors pulled from their real life scenarios to show us how they slipped up and how they recovered. It’s beautiful to see a couple committed to their Union and never giving up on them. I think that is the key to staying Married and being happy is WANTING to be married and WANTING to be married to your partner. I’m grateful to Kevin and Melissa for opening up to us and imparting great wisdom. I will definitely add this to my love/relationship/marriage book collection lol! I hope all this knowledge will make me somebody’s amazing wife! Lol

This book is so refreshing! It explores several important aspects of a serious relationship & marriage, and encourages discussions that might otherwise be uncomfortable. My spouse and I learned so much about each other, even after being together 15 years. This book is also funny, and it digs into topics not often discussed in strict Christian homes. However, this book is great for people of all religious backgrounds.This book is great because even if you do not agree with the way that the couple chooses to govern their own marriage, you can still gain such great insight from reading about their Journey. This book is not just for married people, as the topics Inspire conversations that can be explored in any romantic relationship or simply for self-reflection. I highly recommend this book!

I bought this both here and on Audible and I’m so glad I did. Each chapter provides incredible insight into what it means to be married for the long haul. They don’t sugarcoat anything and, as someone who also grew up churchy, I appreciate that they don’t hide behind religiosity nor do they “perform” spirituality.If you don’t have the audio version, I highly recommend giving it a listen. Kev is Kev (always hilarious), but there’s something about hearing Melissa speak her truth and vulnerability that is beautifully moving. I listened in one day.Next up is going back through each chapter and actually working through the relationship checkins with my spouse. I can’t wait to experience the conversations this book is going to start.I recommend this for everyone, from single to seasoned married folks.

This book is AMAZING! It's a great down to earth book talking about the REAL struggles couples go through in a marriage. They put themselves on display using REAL fights from the past which not only gives us great examples for their advice, but it also helps the reader see each argument from both perspectives. IT IS NOT A SPIRITUAL BOOK. It's an autobiography of their 18 year journey together. It's purpose is to show the reader that a healthy marriage we show the world is full of real issues that left unaddressed can weaken your relationship. Thank you to the Fredericks for COMMUNICATING WITH WORLD. You were honest, transparent, and vulnerable, which hopefully helps every reader see that in themselves.

Let me start by saying that I am a single woman who is hopeful that one day I’ll be married. This book is going to help me be prepared. Melissa and Kevin share how marriage can be hard but so very worth it if you and the other person are willing to do the work together. They give REALISTIC advice. Not just “Communicate to your partner.” But what that looks likes for real and in real conversations. It’s beautiful. They also have a YouTube series to go along with the book on @mrskevonstage channel. You’ll also see their podcast The Love Hour which is ahhhmazzinggg. Get the book and if you use Audible, Melissa and Kevin read the book!

This book is EVERYTHING! I can definitely appreciate their vulnerability in sharing their process and the tools they use to help them as they continue working. We all have a story, we’ve all been through the fire, but not everyone is willing to be raw about their experience. This book is DEFINITELY one that can help navigate singles on how to approach marriage. Not so we won’t have problems, but so when they arise, we can have ways of approaching differently. I HIGHLY recommend this book. Life be lifting out here and when I’m down in the trenches, throwing a bunch of scriptures at me is not what’s needed, REAL LIFE APPLICATION (along with the prayer and scripture) is what will help pull you out. I am thankful for Marriage Be Hard!

I enjoy how courageously they tell THEIR truth. They are sharing their approach and transparently telling the truth about what DID and DID NOT work. I love that. So many relationship and self help books are written from an impractical approach where the advice sounds nice but isn’t easy to apply.I also like the way they weave in the positive and adverse influences religious upbringing has in their marriage. Although my experience is different, I appreciate the insight into how emphasis on purity can make positive self image and transitioning into marriage challenging.In my opinion, it’s worth the $20.

It’s honest. It’s vulnerable. It’s RAW… and it is HILARIOUS! This book is everything! My husband and I are going through so many of these things on a daily basis. It’s a breath of fresh air, reading a book about marriage written by an admittedly flawed and imperfect couple. They are not your “marriage goals”. They are a work in progress like all of us! The conversations in this book have already struck up conversations between my husband and I. We spent two hours in the car today talking about our sexual accelerators, brakes, and red/yellow/green lights. So eye opening! Thank you so much for getting these conversations started in my marriage and thank you for your honesty!

I was so excited for this book to come out because the Love Hour was literally my favorite marriage podcast. I’m so glad I also purchased the audible because I’m able to hear it in Kev and Melissa’s voice which makes it so much better. My husband and I listen together and then talk about the check ins at the end of the chapters and it’s a great book for both married and none married couples to read. I love their vulnerability and sharing some of the things that happened in the beginning of their marriage. I’m only 6 years into my marriage and the advice I’ve received from them both from the Love Hour Podcast and this book has been pivotal in making sure I communicate effectively and avoid some of these problems in my own marriage. We’re not perfect and marriage be hard but having a couple like this share their experiences makes the hard times doable.

Never have I ever read a book like this. Relationships/Marriage comes with no real guidance about the intricate conversations and self-reflection each of us should go through before we commit to someone. This book has the real conversations and revelations I wish I had had, with tons of humor by a loving couple who worked/works hard on their relationship. Kevin and Melissa Fredericks wrote candidly and honestly about sex, family, children, work - everything that real life contains. I’ve been married 22 years and I learned some things about myself, reading this. So this book is for anyone who wants to do better, love better, and have some laughs along the way. I highly recommend this book to everyone.

I saw a post on kevonstage Instagram about how when she's done scrolling, he's done scrolling and I thought to myself, yup, that's how it's supposed to be lol and hurried and bought this book. Honestly, I received it earlier today and I'm already half way through. It's a must read. I love the draws on their own issue to show us how relatable they are. I've had the same arguments, same insecurities as Melissa, and their resolutions are nuggets I'll insert into my own relationship. This is so dope! Buy it y'all. So worth it.