The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

by: Gary Chapman (0)

Over 20 million copies sold!

A perennial New York Times bestseller for over a decade!

Falling in love is easy. Staying in love—that’s the challenge. How can you keep your relationship fresh and growing amid the demands, conflicts, and just plain boredom of everyday life?

In the #1 New York Times international bestseller The 5 Love Languages, you’ll discover the secret that has transformed millions of relationships worldwide. Whether your relationship is flourishing or failing, Dr. Gary Chapman’s proven approach to showing and receiving love will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your partner—starting today.

The 5 Love Languages is as practical as it is insightful. Updated to reflect the complexities of relationships today, this new edition reveals intrinsic truths and applies relevant, actionable wisdom in ways that work.

Includes the Couple's Personal Profile assessment so you can discover your love language and that of your loved one.

The Quotes

Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct. I need to be loved by someone who chooses to love me, who sees in me something worth loving.

Love doesn’t keep a score of wrongs. Love doesn’t bring up past failures.

I am amazed by how many individuals mess up every new day with yesterday. They insist on bringing into today the failures of yesterday, and in so doing, they pollute a potentially wonderful present.

When you make a request of your spouse, you are affirming his or her worth and abilities.

Love makes requests, not demands. When I demand things from my spouse, I become a parent and she the child.

The Reviews

After reading some reviews saying that the author was stuck in old ways, very religion based, and stating that a woman should have sex with her husband even if she doesn’t want to, I chose not to buy it. After trying to find other books I came back to this one and decided to buy it JUST for the quiz in the back. After the quiz I ended up reading the whole book. NEVER did I think or read anything the bad reviews said. I NEVER read a section in the book suggesting you should sleep with your husband just because he wants to. As a matter of fact, he says that sex will come after each spouse feels they are being loved properly and that sex is not the physical touch love language. NEVER did I see him suggest a woman should stay in a bad relationship and suck it up. I’m not a religious person and the very small amount of religious mentions did not bother me. If you're only looking for problems in the book, then why read it? I think this book can be extremely helpful and guiding towards bettering your relationship. You get what you put into it! The only thing he suggests is that before giving up and calling it quits, you learn your spouses love language and test it out daily for 2 months. He says this to BOTH spouses. This is teamwork, not only one sided. He uses examples where both spouses are making mistakes and have to put in work. It is very eye opening and helpful. So please, for the sake of bettering your relationship and understanding how to love each other better, get the book and give it a chance.

Absolutely every person should read this book. When I complained about something my husband did that annoyed me, he would say, "why don't you ever tell me about the things I do right?" Super evidence that he is a "Words of Affirmation" person. I am an "Acts of Service" person. So if he does something around the house or yard, I tell him what a good job he did, how great it turned out, and I thank him. These are not big deal things. If he drives I thank him for driving, If he empties the trash, I thank him. Stuff most people take for granted, the "Words of Affirmation" person needs to HEAR them. This guy thrives on compliments. I on the other hand, thrive on things like someone doing the dishes, or cleaning the floor. Don't buy me roses. To me, it's a waste of money! You have to read this book to find out which of the five languages you speak, and which your loved ones speak.

I have just started to read this book. In the Acknowledgments, I noticed this, "If all wives loved as she does, fewer men would be looking over the fence." How about "If all husbands loved as he does, fewer women would be looking over the fence."? I am serious.

This book is rooted in religion. It is written solely for straight persons. The author over uses gender pronouns unnecessarily to push outdated gender norms. All the stories of couples are relatively the same, with the wife doing all the cooking and cleaning, and husband working too much and not spending quality time. The author credits himself a miracle worker whenever possible, including after convincing a woman to stay with her emotionally abusive partner based on the idea that if she treats him nicely even while being abused he will eventually come around. The basic, good principles of this book (which should be common sense) are overshadowed with very problematic ideals that may be triggering. It is important to note that while the author has a PhD he is NOT a psychiatrist, nor was his back ground in psychology or social work. His studies were in anthropology. He is a counselor through his church, and attended religious institutions for his education. He does however have clients refer to him as Dr. This is very misleading, and could be detrimental to persons seeking serious help in areas where emotional, physical, or substance abuse is at play, or in relationships where one or both parties is coping with mental illness.

The book was pretty good, it had some valid points and learning that there are different ways that people express their love was important. What I think pulled away from the book was the underlying religious agenda to preach about God. It totally turned me off And I thought it was completely unnecessary to deliver the message. Of course if you are a religious person then this would be right up your alley.

I liked this book. I bought it around the time I started noticing my wife was being combative pretty often. I wanted to understand her, and for her to understand me better. We took the test but the entire time she seemed to make a joke out of it. It turns out, when your significant other is verbally and mentally abusive there is no book that can help you. With a normal person, this book will help you understand the way your partner thinks. I still have this book and will use it in the future when I find someone worth it.

I was once asked to read this book by the only person in the world I love.....I refused. At the time I figured it to be some shrinks opinion on how we should all be in our relationships....what the hell does he know I thought.....what if he is wrong and my future wife bases our whole future on just what he says.....I imagined this book to be some guy with opinions on how to fix problems that he knows nothing about because he doesn't know "us". It's not a good feeling as a man to agree to read a book on relationships because you feel like you're putting everything into the authors hands.....and what if he "doesn't understand" or what if the advice doesn't apply to us.....what if it makes things worse between us because he advises things we don't believe in.....no....I'm not reading that I told her.I thought no matter what we would always figure each other out and we would be ok......I didn't see being asked to read this book , was a cry out from the woman I love hitting a boiling point and her attempt to communicate to me in a different way......the same things she's been trying to for a long time.....Being close minded that day costed me so much regret and misery....I used to wake up to the most beautiful smile in the world and now I don't....I recently ended up reading this book and I couldn't put it down....sounds crazy but it's true. Instead of being some guys opinions or......typical shrink talk that in no way could apply to each specific relationship.......I found it to be a book that opens up the mind to the understanding of love.....and how it is not this one universal "language" we all feel we should be the same with.....I once told her...."nobody taught me how to love, I'm growing....learning".....I pleased with her to understand I love her.......we simply didn't have an understanding of how and why we didnt approach love the exact same way as each other.....only makes sense that it should be the same right? You bicker and argue and it drives you crazy......why doesn't she understand you think.......the book is not an excuse to use or justify a true bad relationship let me add.....but it truly answers so many questions.....it is really a language of love. Once understood, this book leaves you feeling like a fool and only wanting to apply so much of what you've now learned to your future together. It takes away the work of trying to understand the things that at the time make no sense.....and allows you to focus on what's important....loving instead of wasting precious time. Read it carefully and I recommend reading it together.....I didn't get that chance but I can guarantee reading this book with who you love will allow you both to stop frequently throughout the pages and talk,learn,smile, probably cry.....but then go on to a much happier fulfilling life together once the book is closed. It can save so much if you only let it.*Update 12-1-17I drive a bus so I have nothing but time to think as I look out the window and look up at the sky looking around me. You would probably think of screaming kids and noise but for me it is driving in my own little world and using time to think about lifeI am a trainer so I spend my time trying to help people learn how to maintain their body and prevent problems. And the funny thing is that it is are very choices of what we do to our own bodies that I am teaching to have to change. All of our problems nutritionally and physically and even mentally come down too poor choice and repetitive habits that we know we need to change but never do until it's too late. Every single person reading this can relate to thatMy point about what I do is that I spend a lot of time trying to fix my body because professionals out there either won't take the time to do it or I don't have the money to spend on who is needed. I have spent countless months doing stretches and exercises and what I have found is a lot of times I'm doing the exact same stretches and exercises that don't seem to be working. Soooo......why not do different ones then right...... what a lot of reasons it may feel good, you may not know any other stretches or exercises, you may simply believe that if I just do it one more time again tomorrow....THAT it will finally help..... you just believe in that stretch so much that in your mind you just say I'll keep trying. You are maybe even making things worse by this but you're honest to God intentions are to completely cure one of the biggest problems in your life, pain...... I think you see where I'm getting at.Getting a little long for whoever is reading but there is a lot of meaning here that can help who knows thousands of people as long as this review remains online......I will just end it like this..... last night I took a stretch that I have been doing for over 2 years and I changed it in a slightly different way....... a lot of the pain I normally get daily is gone.......just to put a spotlight on that sentence .....I'm saying that what I had been doing for so long..... trying to cure one of the biggest problems in my life that hadnt been working............that I continued doing........ believing in and depending on.... to be my much needed answer.......It wasn't until I allowed the idea of the same stretch applied in a different way, that I ALLOWED life to be better for me.I did not say this stretch doesn't matter anymore and say forget it to never exist again.....no, I used it to COMMUNICATE with my body in the same exact physical form....just different language from mind to body....because I always believed in it.Belief can be amazing and help you....it also can be your own worst enemy when refuse to change your ways.....lots of time I lost believing my way instead of another.....all while would have given anything to accomplish my goal......once again I stood in my own way......but I didn't give up.....otherwise pain would still be here and I wouldn't have came on here to add all these thoughts.You have to go into the book with an open mind because if you do it with the mindset of wanting it to say what it is that you want to hear.....then you can never let the life-changing words happen.......you're learning a language as you read...not what's right and wrong but what was being lost in life.Keep in mind this is a book about the language of love so if you think about when you go to school to learn a different language...you are taking the difficult step of taking time there in order to understand.....be able to take what you understand and apply it.....and be able to communicate in a NEEDED way once you learn....AND THEN USE......communicate and UNDERSTAND eachother.Just think how you feel when you meet somebody and you want to communicate but you can't and you get frustrated. you are trying to figure out what you want the other person to know and they're trying to tell or show you..... it becomes stressful and sometimes you end up walking away from each other never knowing the real meaning that was right there between the two of you. When you are able to speak the same language this simply does not happen.....The same two people if we're able to learn the same language, could come back in front of one another again and.....just imagine......imagine the possibilities with that communication.......so much never lost again.The exact same message and the exact same feelings that were always there, except now instead of the stress of not understanding, there is the excitement for anything to be possible just by coming together and understanding.....The power of language is amazing........think of when you meet somebody and they're able to speak five or six different languages, you are in awe and wish you could do it.well imagine being able to speak the one language in life that is the most unexplainable, powerful language and meaning of life, love....I would also like to mention the fact that if these two people sat down and learn each other's languages together how helpful that is.....and how much easier it is to be able to learn how to communicate with the exact person that you're trying to ........spending time helping each other learn different languages.......TOGETHER.Bus is parked.

This is a great book! Ironically, it arrived the day my girlfriend broke up with me and now that I have finished the book I can see what I could have done differently during my relationship. I learned her love language as well as my own through this book and more importantly, I discovered how to speak her language. It is too late for me, but if you are having a rough time in your relationship and you don't feel the spark any more, you owe it to yourself and your partner to read this book. Both of you need to read it if you are serious about staying together.

It's amazing how simple it really is! Worth every cent! Great read!! Some valuable stuff in the lititure! Read with your partner and it brings it to a while new light! Surly worth the time to read alone and with your loved one! Enjoy!

I am enjoying this book. It has improved my relationship and communication skills. I find it effective that we share the reading in each chapter section. We discuss what we understood and how it pertains to our situation. It had opened us up tremendously. I wish you well on mending your relationship and know you will get what you need from this book.

Great advice in relationships, and marriages if you are married. I read this book with my girlfriend and we both enjoyed it thoroughly. This book gives a deeper insight on love languages for you and your significant other and guides you on a better path of understanding one another. If you come across this review, I wish you the best of luck on your love journey. peace & love family.

This is the second time I have read this book. The first time I was in a relationship, this time, I am married to that same wonderful Godly Man. I am very encouraged to discover his primary Love language. Thanks to all who allowed their stories to be shared.

This is a short book. I think I read it in about 2 hours. Even then, it could be shorter because the actual concept of 5 Love Languages is very simple. There's probably a 15 minute video somewhere that conveys the same material. However, if you are like me, the information does not stick in my head so it is good to have to book around to remind myself. I really recommend this for people in a long term relationship. A lot of things may make more sense once you read it. It did for me. It might seem a bit dated to younger, modern readers, although I think the concept still applies.

I’m still reading the book and it is very insightful. Better understanding of love. I definitely recommend the 5 love languages.

Been married twenty-three years and always had a roller coaster relationship. I finally realize what I was doing wrong and hope to rectify the problem with the information from this book. Thank you Gary Chapman.

The author’s premise is that communication is the main issue that many couples face today and he enumerates the different ways he’s witnessed love being expressed.

I've heard other ppl talking about love languages but didn't know the extent of what they were discussing.Looked it up on Amazon and I'm very happy I bought it. This has given me insight on his to talk to my partner in their love language.

This book is an easy read. If you are having troubles in your relationship or you just want to do better for your spouse, get this book. Easy read and so informative!

I liked that I learned so much about myself but also about my husband. I would recommend this book to anyone in a relationship!

If you’re truly serious about learning the love languages and maybe even being a better partner and loving your partner in their love language then this is the book you need to read!

I highly recommend reading this book as it is easy to understand and very informative. A must for people in love! Great product!

I definitely recommend this book for anyone in love

It gives you a better understanding of any relationship

What a great book! Want to order his other ones too!Written in simple easily understandable language, but oh so very good advice!I am in my 60's, divorced for ages and set up and set in my way. Anything worth even a penny i owned, i earned myself!! Not looking. But finally meeeting the biggest love of my life. Fighting it so long but finally end May got engaged.This book saved us. Thomas, so much kinder, forgiving and considerate then me, found it for us!!! Fighting for almost a month!!! Both of us reading this book (1 each haha) put us back together!No matter if you long couple, new couple...this book put us bCk together, explaining much!So grateful, so very grateful to this book!

This book was recommended to me. So far it’s very insightful. Easy to understand and absorb.

The book is in Excellent condition!

It can help your marriage but only if you commit to putting into practice the principles found here!

I think this should be a tool every married person has! It really does help to get to know your spouse even more!

This book contains little new info, it gives another view of what we have heard or seen. The idea of "trying" new methods for trial periods may seem strange.

It helps understand where each other is coming from. If you are working on your relationship I strongly recommend this book.

The concepts explained in this book can help you with all relationships in your life, romantic or not. Every little bit you understand about those around you helps.

After reading this book. I learned that love can be so much more and it gives insight into yourself and that of others.

I think people struggle in relationships because they expect what they give... We all feel like we give everything.. but what you give may not be what your partner needs! This book really helps to explain that and let's you understand what your partner might need or be missing!

I already own this book thought it was good so I sent the one currently ordered to a relative. Easy to read and great advice and insight.

Purchased two copies one for my boyfriend and one for myself a few nights out of the week we will read a chapter before going to bed and debrief over the information. Dating in our mid-40’s and rightfully so we are set in our own ways of what “love should look like”! We found this book to be so helpful and relatable as to why we are the way we are! (If that make sense lol)! All in all I highly recommend this book as a great reference book to supporting and understanding your love language! Honestly I never knew it was such a thing until after reading this book!

Hard to image that a simple book can have such a profound effect upon a couple’s relationship, but that is exactly what happened. I’m not sure my wife and I have ever been happier. We learned to speak the other’s love language and everything changed. I highly recommend this book. Of course, you both have to put in the effort, but I can tell you that the techniques truly work!

This has truly helped my husband and I after 22 years of marriage to learn our love languages over again because we didn’t realize they could change. I am glad I decided to buy this book.

After reading this book three times in my life I finally have been applying the advice. Staying married for 27 years is work! But it is satisfying to finally get to a stage where we know how to fill each other's love tanks.My husband buys me flowers or little gifts, takes me out for lunch or empties the dishwasher for me. These things speak volumes to someone who needs gifts, acts of service or quality time. Generally if I go out to lunch I get to talk as much as I want. ;) I'd say when I am listened to I feel the most loved. But I'd say most people would like to be spoiled in all sorts of ways.If you are wondering how you can delight your partner or help them feel loved, then this is the book for you. It is a true classic and will give you all sorts of ideas for how you can show love in the way your spouse wants to be loved. It really is simple once you figure out your spouse's love language. I have noticed that most of the marriage books I read comment on love languages now. It is one of the most essential things you can know if you want to stay happily married! Life is challenging enough without not knowing the secret to your spouse's love language. My husband loves acts of service so all I have to do is clean a room or vacuum the house or make dinner or lunch. I draw the line at getting up to make breakfast even though I do it now and then!I'm happy I read this book again for the third time. Now it makes a lot more sense! Sometimes you just need to be ready for the information. This could be the key to you and your spouse opening the door to happier times and a more satisfied life. You won't regret reading this at all!~The Rebecca Review

I read this on a suggestion from my therapist. Having some relationship issues and this really did bring so insight on knowing what you consider as giving love and other peoples. Definitely a good read

If you do not get something from this book to help you within your marriage, you're not trying! Love love love this book and plan to reread it!!

I ordered this book awhile back, but I couldn't find it, so I reordered it. It's a good book to learn the different ways people like to feel with their significant other. Thank you for writing this book.

This book offers so many solutions to both parties involved. We have found it very helpful on many levels.

This book is a must for every person. You need to learn your love language and your spouses to make sure your loving them the way the feel loved - and vise versa. Buy it! Easy read with lots of info

Very informative and revealing. I understand things a lot clearer now about the type of person I am. Which is almost of more importance than my new understanding of my partner. I haven't put into much action. Running tests here and there to try and nail down her giving and receiving languages.

A clear, straightforward, approachable description of the various ways that people attempt to communicate their emotions and expectations, whether or not they know that’s what they’re doing.Balanced, practical advice which couples (or even one mate within a troubled marriage) can apply without the direct supervision of a counselor.Valuable principles and techniques, easily applicable to non-romantic relationships.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years and we've slowly drifted apart. We've both said things like "we're great roommates", ignored calls/texts, and pointed the blame at the other. I reached out to a friend who highly recommended this book and it has given me hope that we can salvage our relationship. Our friends and family say we're a great match and we get along great, most of the time. I now see a light and hope in my heart. I'm excited to see where we're at in a few months! Recommended for everyone: single, taken, married, parent, or younger.

A friend recommended this book. It helped us to understand and correct our behaviors , our love languages. Truly wish we had it 30 years ago.

Explains so much about ourselves and our spouse. At the end he touches the true source of Love. This is simple to follow and easy to read for couples who are committed to developing active Love in their relatioship.

I have listened to the audio version many times! This book is a great way to find your way back to your spouse of girlfriend, or really any relationship. By identifying your "Language of love", you know better how to show your love in a manner that will benefit your partner. For example, my language of love is "Touch". I react to touch. You can bring me a dozen roses, but giving me a kiss, hug or playful wrestling is the better way to show me you care. My spouse's language of love is "Affirmations". By thanking him, telling him how much I appreciated him helping me in the garden, and giving praise and compliments strengthens our relationship. Enjoy this wonderful book!

I read this book after attending a seminar at work on authentic appreciation, where this book was recommended. The seminar based on some of these concepts was great and so was this book. I wish my ex and I had read it before our marriage dissolved. We would most likely still be together.

You don’t have to read the whole book to get the message. Just bunch of stories for each love language to help you understand each in more depth.1. He speaks of a “In love phase” last around two years wears off and life hits then life suck cause someone or both “love tanks is empty” (feel unloved)2. Five love languages(duh). You find out what your lovers language is the express or as much as possible to maintain love after the in love phase.

I feel it is utterly amazing the things that are so simple to accomplish are never taught to us as kids or young adults. This book has opened my eyes and my heart in ways I never thought possible! I have made alot of mistakes and never knew why, and now I understand that I was speaking French and my wife only understands Portuguese.... I am astounded at the hardships and hurt that I could have avoided, but I promise history is history and my future will be phenomenal with the knowledge I have gained!

Real life examples provide hope for couples everywhere. Chapman’s dedication to understanding the 5 love languages is very admirable. Can be an emotional read when relating to your own love life. Worth the read!

Gave these out as gifts for family couples including myself and husband and we found it to be very insightful and applicable with great results. Thanks 😊

Whether you're single or in a relationship this is a must-read. I do recommend if you're in a relationship that both people in the relationship read this book. It's a great way to help your relationship become stronger. If you're not in a relationship this will help you start out a new relationship in the right direction. Learning the five love languages has taught me so much about my needs within a relationship and makes me only want to work harder on my own relationship and learn more about my significant others needs within our relationship. So glad this book was suggested to me

Not that useful. Takes forever to get to the point. Never finished the book.

After getting married, my MIL (mother-in-law) stated I should read this book, and so I did... Our marriage has been going so perfectly well, and we never have arguments (anymore). After knowing each other for 7 years and being successfully married for 3 of those years, I can truly state this book perfectly captures what it means to love and keep loving your partner. Very well done and well written.

This is such a great book if you really want to please and understand your partner/spouse..taking the test is a must.. Eye opener for sure

Bought this book for my partner along with a digital version for myself. Great asset to have when working on any relationship. Very helpful and easy to understand. I recommend this book to anyone in a relationship that could use a little additional help.

Such a huge help in figuring out the way my significant other likes to be loved with some Christian references.

I wholeheartedly believe everyone should read this book, whether in a relationship or not. This helps you have a better understanding of yourself and others in your life. It gives great ideas to how to work with other languages and express love in the most meaningful ways to other people. A must read!

I loved this book as it helped me figure out what my own love language is so that I can communicate it to others and also communicate to them in their love language as well.

I bought this book for work (long story...), but it was immediately helpful in my relationship! My husband and I both took the quiz at the end of the book and immediately were able to help each other feel more satisfied in our relationship. I'd vaguely heard of the love languages as being a thing from popular culture, but this book is a thorough but readable overview from the person who came up with the concept.The one thing that I didn't like is that the author incorporates his Christian faith at one point — I don't have an issue with his personal beliefs, but it felt out-of-place in a semi-academic book.

I started reading this book because alot of people spoke about it. I started reading this book. So much made sense i even started using it with husband and kids attitudes have changed.

I am recommending this book to everyone. Even if you've been married for 45 years you NEED to read this book. It's a game changer for any couple. I was weeks away from being divorced and after we both read this book we have NEVER been happier in our marriage. Been married 10 years. We feel like we are dating again. Do yourself a favor and just buy it!!!!

I finally grasp the concept of love being poured into me as opposed to me just loving myself. This book is amazing. Love is a basic human need. When received in our Love Language the world appears to be ours to conquer. If not our Love tank is empty and we feel less than, unimportant, and not seen or heard. Great book for everyone.

Me and my fiance read this book together just thinking we would find out more officially what our love language was. Turned out to be so much more than that! We both loved it and feel more love between us than ever before.

The point of marriage is serving one another sacrificially. This book shows you the best ways to do that for your spouse. 10/10.

Great book. Can never go wrong with getting advice at home.

Even though I found that my 35 year marriage was great because we were practicing these concepts, it was still eye opening. I feel I have a better understanding of what we put into the marriage. Previously I thought that we were just lucky or blessed!

Our therapist recommended this book. We are mid 60s and felt like we'd drifted very far apart. Wanted a closer, more emotionally intimate relationship. But, neither of us knew what each of us spoke as a love language. This book helped us figure it out. And our therapist is helping us learn to speak in each other's love language. It's an amazing way to fall in love, again. This time, to stay that way by meeting each other's needs.

This book is very good and I suggest it to anyone feeling like they are struggling in any romantic relationship.

The perfect guide to revitalizing relationships! Chapman is an entrancing writer who persuasively argues learning your significant other's love language is the key to lasting love. It was heart wrenching to read how marriages were torn asunder by misunderstanding one's love language. More joyful are the results obtained when the couples apply Chapman's relationship tips and rekindle dormant love. The chapters on each love language are rich in real-life applications. My love language is Words of Affirmation. I am looking forward to encouraging others through my unique gifts!

While this book is written for married couples, it will be rated 5 stars by anyone who reads it period. Teaches you how to communicate in a meaningful way to the other person.If implemented, can change a good marriage into a Great marriage. It can change a disaster of a marriage and restore hope just in the reading of it, let alone implementation of the principles taught. WOW. Thank you Gary Chapman!!!

This book highlights love language and understanding the depths of a love language in a relationship. This was a great read.

I was once asked to read this book by the only person in the world I love.....I refused. At the time I figured it to be some shrinks opinion on how we should all be in our relationships....what the hell does he know I thought.....what if he is wrong and my future wife bases our whole future on just what he says.....I imagined this book to be some guy with opinions on how to fix problems that he knows nothing about because he doesn't know "us". It's not a good feeling as a man to agree to read a book on relationships because you feel like you're putting everything into the authors hands.....and what if he "doesn't understand" or what if the advice doesn't apply to us.....what if it makes things worse between us because he advises things we don't believe in.....no....I'm not reading that I told her.I thought no matter what we would always figure each other out and we would be ok......I didn't see being asked to read this book , was a cry out from the woman I love hitting a boiling point and her attempt to communicate to me in a different way......the same things she's been trying to for a long time.....Being close minded that day costed me so much regret and misery....I used to wake up to the most beautiful smile in the world and now I don't....I recently ended up reading this book and I couldn't put it down....sounds crazy but it's true. Instead of being some guys opinions or......typical shrink talk that in no way could apply to each specific relationship.......I found it to be a book that opens up the mind to the understanding of love.....and how it is not this one universal "language" we all feel we should be the same with.....I once told her...."nobody taught me how to love, I'm growing....learning".....I pleased with her to understand I love her.......we simply didn't have an understanding of how and why we didnt approach love the exact same way as each other.....only makes sense that it should be the same right? You bicker and argue and it drives you crazy......why doesn't she understand you think.......the book is not an excuse to use or justify a true bad relationship let me add.....but it truly answers so many questions.....it is really a language of love. Once understood, this book leaves you feeling like a fool and only wanting to apply so much of what you've now learned to your future together. It takes away the work of trying to understand the things that at the time make no sense.....and allows you to focus on what's important....loving instead of wasting precious time. Read it carefully and I recommend reading it together.....I didn't get that chance but I can guarantee reading this book with who you love will allow you both to stop frequently throughout the pages and talk,learn,smile, probably cry.....but then go on to a much happier fulfilling life together once the book is closed. It can save so much if you only let it.*Update 12-1-17I drive a bus so I have nothing but time to think as I look out the window and look up at the sky looking around me. You would probably think of screaming kids and noise but for me it is driving in my own little world and using time to think about lifeI am a trainer so I spend my time trying to help people learn how to maintain their body and prevent problems. And the funny thing is that it is are very choices of what we do to our own bodies that I am teaching to have to change. All of our problems nutritionally and physically and even mentally come down too poor choice and repetitive habits that we know we need to change but never do until it's too late. Every single person reading this can relate to thatMy point about what I do is that I spend a lot of time trying to fix my body because professionals out there either won't take the time to do it or I don't have the money to spend on who is needed. I have spent countless months doing stretches and exercises and what I have found is a lot of times I'm doing the exact same stretches and exercises that don't seem to be working. Soooo......why not do different ones then right...... what a lot of reasons it may feel good, you may not know any other stretches or exercises, you may simply believe that if I just do it one more time again tomorrow....THAT it will finally help..... you just believe in that stretch so much that in your mind you just say I'll keep trying. You are maybe even making things worse by this but you're honest to God intentions are to completely cure one of the biggest problems in your life, pain...... I think you see where I'm getting at.Getting a little long for whoever is reading but there is a lot of meaning here that can help who knows thousands of people as long as this review remains online......I will just end it like this..... last night I took a stretch that I have been doing for over 2 years and I changed it in a slightly different way....... a lot of the pain I normally get daily is gone.......just to put a spotlight on that sentence .....I'm saying that what I had been doing for so long..... trying to cure one of the biggest problems in my life that hadnt been working............that I continued doing........ believing in and depending on.... to be my much needed answer.......It wasn't until I allowed the idea of the same stretch applied in a different way, that I ALLOWED life to be better for me.I did not say this stretch doesn't matter anymore and say forget it to never exist again.....no, I used it to COMMUNICATE with my body in the same exact physical form....just different language from mind to body....because I always believed in it.Belief can be amazing and help you....it also can be your own worst enemy when refuse to change your ways.....lots of time I lost believing my way instead of another.....all while would have given anything to accomplish my goal......once again I stood in my own way......but I didn't give up.....otherwise pain would still be here and I wouldn't have came on here to add all these thoughts.You have to go into the book with an open mind because if you do it with the mindset of wanting it to say what it is that you want to hear.....then you can never let the life-changing words happen.......you're learning a language as you read...not what's right and wrong but what was being lost in life.Keep in mind this is a book about the language of love so if you think about when you go to school to learn a different language...you are taking the difficult step of taking time there in order to understand.....be able to take what you understand and apply it.....and be able to communicate in a NEEDED way once you learn....AND THEN USE......communicate and UNDERSTAND eachother.Just think how you feel when you meet somebody and you want to communicate but you can't and you get frustrated. you are trying to figure out what you want the other person to know and they're trying to tell or show you..... it becomes stressful and sometimes you end up walking away from each other never knowing the real meaning that was right there between the two of you. When you are able to speak the same language this simply does not happen.....The same two people if we're able to learn the same language, could come back in front of one another again and.....just imagine......imagine the possibilities with that communication.......so much never lost again.The exact same message and the exact same feelings that were always there, except now instead of the stress of not understanding, there is the excitement for anything to be possible just by coming together and understanding.....The power of language is amazing........think of when you meet somebody and they're able to speak five or six different languages, you are in awe and wish you could do it.well imagine being able to speak the one language in life that is the most unexplainable, powerful language and meaning of life, love....I would also like to mention the fact that if these two people sat down and learn each other's languages together how helpful that is.....and how much easier it is to be able to learn how to communicate with the exact person that you're trying to ........spending time helping each other learn different languages.......TOGETHER.Bus is parked.

My friend told me about the book. I read it twice and would read it again. It was insightful. It made me aware of some things in my relationship that I never thought of before. I liked the questionnaire in the back that you and your partner can take. We took it at two different times and we had similar answers .

Great read. So helpful to understand what makes relationships work.

The book came in great condition, and it’s a great read!

Better than I expected. We both read it and discussed the information. Helpful to know how to better understand your partner.

Years ago someone told me about this book. Recently someone special to me mentioned it again. I figured I should read it, and see what all the fuss was about. If you want to understand love wither it be your spouse, friend, family member, children, this is the book. I blasted through it in about a weekend and it was a super easy, and relatable read. Do yourself, and those around you a favor and give it a shot.

It is easy to read.

This is a great book for couples.

I think every young person, contemplating marriage nowadays, should read this book as counseling for a better life with your spouse.

I enjoyed finding out my love language. I was surprised

It is so nice I can take it with me everywhere

I've read the book and done studies on the book. It's powerful.I buy several on sale and keep them on hand to accompany a gift for every wedding I attend or buy a gift for.

This book is a great read for couples. It explains a lot of things that will help relationships.

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts
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